The vicious cycle

So I have ventured into the world of online dating, just to see what my options are; I'm determined not to be alone forever. I've met a few interesting and attractive people, but I've met one in particular that I'm really interested in. We have spent the past 4 days talking for hours on end, and our first date (in person) is this coming Friday. I really like him. He seems family oriented, balanced, and harmless. But are they ever really just harmless, when they have the ability to crush your heart later on down the road? You know what is sad? It is this fear that paralyzes me in the dating department. I talk myself out of trusting a guy. I mean, I really can't imagine where this fear could come from? Was it the fact that my daughter's dad cheated on me and made my life a living hades for 2-ish years? Or could it be that the One guy I have ever really loved, Phillip, ultimately betrayed me and my trust in the end? And of course, I know what most rationial people are thinking at this very moment..."It must be the men you pick."
And with that being said, I couldn't agree more. I'm sorry, but I have to be attracted to the guy, physically as well as emotionally. The whole dating process wears me out.
It is a general consensus that everyone has a soulmate. So where is mine? Did I lose my chance when I didn't take Phillip back? Or will I be one of those, who will find the love of their life later on down the road? Either way, I simply can't bear anymore relationship devistation.
After Phillip, I mentally prepared myself just to be single and to focus all of my energy on raising Skylar and being a good mom. But how fair is that to me? I've been single now for over 2 years, and now unfortunately I am ready to move on from the single drama. But.......that means I'm putting myself at risk for relationship drama. The vicious cycle never ends...